Police officers give so much of themselves to their work, from the ever-changing shifts to facing different challenges each day, but none of that would be possible without a support system.
For Lilydale’s Kelly Parker, she knows this first-hand, as her husband has served as a member of Victoria Police for a little over eight years.
He joined when their youngest child was 10 days old, and with two children, Kelly admitted it can be challenging, “but overall we are proud he puts that uniform on each day”.
As a serving member of the Critical Incident Response Team (CIRT), Star Mail won’t reveal many details about Kelly’s husband.
CIRT are highly trained officers who support frontline members in high-risk incidents, particularly sieges, barricade incidents and searches for armed and/or violent persons.
Because of this, the worry can be immense, Kelly said, especially recently when her husband was deployed to Porepunkah to assist in the manhunt for fugitive Desi Freeman.
“The recent events, such as Porepunkah, have affects on our lives. I can stop the kids from watching the news, but I can’t stop the radio when we’re on our way home,” she said.
“I can’t stop what is said in the school yards or on the streets that a murderer is on the loose, and their dad is going in there to find him.
“My kids are eight and 10, they’re old enough to understand a bit, but not quite old enough to understand their father has extensive training to do what he does.”
As the country prepares to commemorate National Police Remembrance Day on Monday 29 September, it will be a day of sombre reflection as families remember their loved ones, especially Detective Leading Senior Constable Neal Thompson and Senior Constable Vadim de Waart-Hottart, who were shot dead in the line of duty in Porepunkah.
For the families of serving members, the day is a reminder that no police officer is guaranteed a return home.
“My heart is with the families of those fallen. I never wish to be you, and you are my biggest fear,” Kelly said.
“It’s really strange when a high school friend messages me and says her husband is headed away and she feels uneasy, and I say to her, ‘it’s okay, they wouldn’t send him if he wasn’t equipped’.
“There are times I worry about where or what my husband is doing. But then I ground myself. My husband is trained and will always choose coming home to his family over anything.”
While the big moments are impactful, Kelly said the everyday requires adjustment, teamwork, flexibility and support.
“I’ve learnt that the shift never finishes when the roster says. The job is demanding, and some days when I can only bring 20 per cent to the house, he brings the 80 per cent, and roles are switched when needed.
“I’ve learnt I need to be on guard 24/7 as a parent, my husband can be called away at any point. So I need to be available for my kids 24/7.”
As the son of a now-retired career-serving Victoria Police officer, Kelly said she knows her husband will always have support and guidance to get him through the hard days.
“I’m confident with any challenges he comes across or faces, he seeks advice through his father or colleagues and or counsellors provided by Victoria Police,” she said.
Kelly said knowing her husband does his job with the community in mind makes her incredibly proud.
“Being married to a man who is so dedicated to protecting the community is a good feeling. I’m proud of him and very proud he is the father of my children.”
While National Police Remembrance Day is about celebrating and commemorating the lives taken too soon in the line of duty, as well as those who have died outside of the force, Kelly said it is also a chance to thank current members.
Kelly said it was important to highlight and champion the work they do every day to protect and serve the community.
“When you put on that uniform each day, know that I and many around you stand with you. We thank you for your endless service, and at the end of the day, we want you home with us and with your families.
“I have so many family and friends in the blue and white uniform, from my husband, my brother-in-law, to lifelong coaches, and you all are incredible.
“We thank you for your service, just always come home to your family, because that’s who counts in the end.”