A mother’s love

By Melissa Donchi
WHEN Mary Bariola’s son was diagnosed with a rare blood disorder causing his kidneys to break down, she knew what she had to do.
Knowing that waiting lists for kidneys stretched into years, Mrs Bariola immediately checked to see if one of her own kidneys could save her son.
Luckily, the kidneys matched and the Bariolas began preparing for the major surgery that would happen next.
Speaking from home almost a month after the surgery, Mrs Bariola and her son Robert are recovering well. But while the operation was relatively easy their journey was anything but.
“It’s been a long, long wait,” is how Mrs Bariola described those nailbiting years.
Mrs Bariola’s son Robert was diagnosed with the blood disease vasculitis two-and-a-half years ago.
The disease causes blood vessels to become inflamed and destroys the kidneys.
He was treated with dialysis to artificially filter his blood.
“Robert was sick on dialysis for two-and-a-half years, I would not have wanted to watch him like that while he waited for a donor,” Mrs Bariola said.
“He was nauseated, always dry retching, could barely eat anything.”
Watching Robert deteriorate was particularly hard for Mrs Bariola, having already lost a son.
Nearly seven years ago Mrs Bariola lost her son Mark in a tragic car accident when he was only 34 years old.
He left behind his wife, Janet, and their daughter, Grace Amethyst Rose, who is now seven years old.
Mark was the second youngest of Mrs Bariola’s four children and would have been 42 this year. Gerard, 36 is the youngest and Adrian, 50, is the oldest. Robert is 47.
“I had already lost a son so all my energy went into giving this son a chance at life,” Mrs Bariola said.
“Over the last two-and-a-half years it’s been my main goal to give my son a kidney.”
But Mrs Bariola’s goal of giving her son a kidney hit a hurdle when she learned she would have to lose up to 15 kilos to aid her recovery.
“I love food and have always been a bit overweight,” Mrs Bariola said. “I couldn’t imagine how I was going to lose it.”
But with the help from a Healesville weight watching group called Slimmers, Mrs Bariola achieved her goal.
“I give a lot of credit to my Slimmers as they gave me so much strength and encouragement,” she said.
The operation took place on 21 November and recovery will take four to six weeks.
Robert’s recovery is almost complete. He is living at home and driving a car.
He still has to be at the hospital every morning at 8am for a check-up but these will become less and less regular.
With both of them at home and recovering well, Mrs Bariola couldn’t be happier with the results.
“As soon as he got the kidney he felt like a million dollars. It changed his life,” Mrs Bariola said.
“I’ve now seen what one kidney can do for someone and would urge anyone in a similar position to do the same.”